Save Yourself
by Erasera
Summary: [Quall] ONESHOT. This is my very first post and it's a songfic. In the middle of a conversation between Quistis and Squall, things take a different course. R&R!


**Save Yourself**

_By: Virulent Enmity_

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. They came from the beloved game of Final Fantasy 8 which was made by the wonderful company of Square-Enix. For this story, I decided to use the song "Save Yourself" by Stabbing Westward. And of course, I don't own that either. If you haven't heard it yet, I strongly recommend you to, especially while reading this songfic.

**Author's Rambles**: THIS FIC HAS BEEN **EDITED!** This is my first songfic. It really doesn't have any meaning to it. I wrote it out of boredom. A friend of mine read it and wanted a copy because she said it was good. I don't really like it, but I want to know what you think about it. If anyone does decide to read this, please R&R. Be a good critic. I'd really appreciate it! Enjoy!

----------------

_I know your life is empty, _

And you hate to face this world alone

----------------

Squall looked at Quistis and the tears that trickled down her face. Maybe she was right. Maybe he did need to leave Rinoa in the past.

----------------

_So you're searching for an angel, _

Someone who can make you whole

----------------

He gently placed his hands on her cheeks and wiped away those tears. Looking deep into her crystal blue eyes, he seemed to feel her pain, understand what she was going through. _Or did he? _Quistis just stared back up at him in complete confusion.

"Squall--?" She called his name, squinting at him quizzically. He moved a finger up to her lips to silence her.

"Shh, don't say anything..." His voice sounded so calm and cool, although on the inside, he didn't know what to do.

He could remember when she first came to garden at age ten. She often sat alone, as did he, watching all the other junior cadets laugh and play together. He never wanted that kind of attention in the first place, so it didn't bother him. He didn't need them. He didn't need anyone, but in all honesty, he knew that wasn't true at all. She, on the other hand, looked hurt because she had no friends. As they grew up together - and to some extent talked, he felt connected to her. _Was it still just a connection? Or was it something more that he neglected to acknowledge years ago?  
_  
He leaned down and pressed his lips softly to hers. She accepted without hesitation, kissing him back, snaking her arms around his neck, pulling him in closer to deepen the kiss. He moved his hands slowly from her face to her waist, getting lost in the unexpectedly sweet taste of her mouth.

----------------

_I cannot save you... _

I can't even save myself!

So just save yourself!

----------------

Squall gently forced her backward, toward the bed, their tongues never-ending their playful entwining. They climbed onto the bed. This sudden longing for each other overpowered them both as they caressed each other, trailed their hands; exploring. Never had the commander ever felt the need to have someone as much as he did now. Her kisses made him shiver and not once did he want her to stop. Not once...

----------------

_I know that you've been damaged, _

Your soul has suffered such abuse...

But I am not your savior,

I am just as **fucked** as you!

_I am just as fucked as you..._

----------------

He pulled back for a moment and just looked at her. Taking in her beautiful face. He always thought Quistis was a beautiful woman. Hell, who didn't? Never in his wildest dreams did he imagine himself with her like this. Sure, he'd always cared about her, just not in the way that she wanted him to. _Was he doing the right thing? Is this what she really wanted? Is it what **he** really wanted?_

_'Two lonely people, confused about their feelings. That think nothing is left for them. Coming together hoping to save one another.'_

----------------

_I cannot save you... _

I can't even save myself!

So just save yourself!

----------------

_'Sounds pathetic!' _He smiled at that thought.

"You should smile more often...it looks good on you."

Squall widened his grin as Quistis approached him for yet another heated lip-lock. She removed his heavy leather jacket and slowly pulled his white short-sleeved shirt over his head, her eyes observing his wonderfully toned body. As their actions continued, Rinoa appeared in Squall's mind. He felt as if he was betraying her. There was no way that he could forget about Rinoa even though she was deceased. He couldn't say he wasn't in love with her anymore and move on with his life. He would be lying to himself and to Quistis. Even in the afterlife, Rinoa seemed to have a huge affect on his life and it was tearing him apart...

He hated himself now, kissing and touching a woman he had mixed feelings for. He felt like he was using her to release him momentarily from his pain, and he didn't like it. He didn't like what this was doing to Quistis. He truly pitied himself...

----------------

_Please don't take pity on me... _

Please don't take pity on me...

PLEASE DON'T TAKE PITY ON ME!

PLEASE DON'T TAKE PITY ON ME!

My life has been a nightmare,

My soul is fractured to the bone.

And if I must be lonely,

I think I'd rather be alone

_I think I'd rather be **alone**!_

----------------

He unbuttoned her blouse, revealing a silky black bra underneath. He removed her blouse completely and tossed it backwards, not caring where it landed. He placed butterfly kisses on her neck and went all the way down to her stomach, his mouth practically devouring her body. Every time his soft lips connected with her skin, she couldn't help but quiver. She lie her head back on the fluffy pillow and gasped when she felt his tongue circling her navel. _This just can't be real... _

With his tongue, he blazed a wet trail all the way up to her sensitive collarbone, making her moan in ecstasy. He met her gaze once more and kissed her tenderly.

_'How can this seem so right, yet...it feels so wrong? Fuck...'_ he thought.

----------------

_You cannot save me... _

You can't even **save yourself!**

----------------

Her nails glided over his muscular chest and circled his perfectly shaped abdomen. Her fingers again began to move downward towards his trim waist. They passed his zipper and stopped between the junction of his thighs. Without even bothering to rethink her next movement, she gently caressed him. Feeling the contact through his pants, he whimpered against her lips, his body responding pleasantly to the contact, and her mouth displaying a mischievous smile.

She began removing his belts when something told him to stop her. He grabbed her slender wrists with his left hand which made them both equally shocked.

"Stop..." he spoke to her calmly.

This was wrong...this was all so wrong. He let go of her wrists and pressed his hands firmly into the mattress on either side of her body to support himself.

"Why? You don't want this?" her vocalization was sweet and soothing to his ears.

"It's not that...I just...can't."

_'I can't save you, Quistis...'_

----------------

_I cannot save you... _

I can't even save myself!

----------------

With that, he got up, put on his clothes that were discarded and headed for the door. She watched him the entire time in total silence. What could she possibly say to make him stay? When he reached the door, he turned around and gave her a meaningful look.

"I'm sorry, Quistis, I--"

"I understand Squall."

----------------

_Save yourself... _

So just **save yourself!**

----------------**  
**

He smiled weakly and left out of the door. There was so many things she had wanted to say to him. So many things that she felt he would not understand, even if she explained it thoroughly. All she could do was wait...

"Some day, Squall, some day," she sighed to herself.

(**End**)

**Author's Rambles**: So, how was it? Dull, huh? The original was shorter and even worse than this. I tried to keep Squall in character according to the game. He does seem like the type of person to have little to say before, during, and after something like that.

I think it was kinda sad how he left Quistis in her room like that, but hell that's Squall for ya.

Anywho, could you, oh mighty reader, be so kind as to review for an old unworthy writer such as myself? I would be **_so_** grateful. Remember, the fate of my writing any more stories lies in your hands.


End file.
